Thursday, March 29, 2012

Poems forthcoming in The Delinquent and Burley

I have five pieces of writing coming out in April: three with The Delinquent, and two with Burley.

Below is a 3D printer, one day soon humans will be printing everything they want, it will be like Star Trek, but without food, and everything will need batteries.

This is not a microwave

To quote New Scientist paraphrasing Canny:

"Once they have developed ink-jet cartridges that can handle all the polymers needed for casing and circuit printing, Canny predicts they could make, say, a remote control for a TV."

Here I was thinking humanity would be able to shoot 3D printers at Mars and have the printers make everything colonists require before the colonists even set a foot on the planet, I guess what is needed is more remote controls, and ducks.

Note the yellow duck

And shoes.

This shoe was designed by David Cronenberg

Because shoes of the future are here now.

Below are mock-ups of the first in two series of death robots I will be printing out. I have started stockpiling batteries courtesy of ex-housemates.

Mark 1 and 2 Death Robots, a stranger designed these

And Warren Ellis is worried about robots that will eat your greens, and rotted human flesh [Ellis has it wrong, these machines he is concerned with are anti-Zombie machines].

And here are acceptance words from The Delinquent:

Hi again Andrew,

Welcome back to delinquency, an independent state of mind. There is no National Anthem.

A bijou (and precarious) residence on the edge of sanity, sure, but the visions are inspired and, on a clear day, local legend has it that glory may be apprehended.

In a magical land, where the one-eyed man is king, and interest rates are always high, an epic adventure is about to begin

[There follows a montage of writers playing ping-pong, and sweeping across a desolate moor in slow motion, their hair wind-swept, hearts pounding, mouths mouthing /emotional entreaties, like a fleet of divas on the crest of a high note.]

In a crazy world, where stockbrokers rule, a rebellion is coming

   April 2012

[Presentation Ends]

[Main Feature Begins]

Okay, so I know we normally try to weave your acceptance details seamlessly into the body of our nonsense, but this time is an exception.
What you really want to know is that we’re very pleased to say we’ll be printing “Plod”, “Seven true sentences for Ernest” and “The Big Red One”  in issue 17 of the delinquent. Many thanks for your submissions.

The magazine will be out in April, we’ll let you know when. Hopefully things won’t be slowed down too much by releasing the mag simultaneously on kindle for the first time.

Thank you for your magnificent words, and for your inestimable contribution to this magazine.

all the best,


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